Restoration: It's a God thing....

A week ago today I was in Atlanta at the end of a day of business day. My daughter and I called Dh and asked for help finding an address in town. A few seconds later the address was texted to my phone and we were on our way. You see, my daughter and I had had this dream of going to the American Girl Store for at least six years. When you grow up in Arkansas, getting to an American Girl store is about a 600 miles from home dream. My later mother had purchased my daughter's first Bitty Babies when she was barely born. When my daughter was born, she was the first and only grand daughter for both sides of our families...and she was born early after a very difficult pregnacy in Alaska. We had been told she would have serious issues throughout my pregnancy and we were not sure she would ever be capable of learning at all...we were prepared for her to be severely handicapped mentally and physically, and had been encouraged to end her life during pregnancy because of the issues she had.

My mother sewed for me as a child, when Madison was born, mom began to sew for her as well. Through the years my late mom made matching outfits for daughter and her dolls, we received gifts at Christmas for the dolls, and we loved our time together playing with them. My daughter is now thirteen, yet she still loves her dolls and I love that she does. She has made it "cool" with her friends to bring the American Girls over for pizza and a movie nights, sleep overs, and tea parties.

We're a pretty frugal family, so the concept of $36 dollar doll outfits would have to be saved for Christmas or a birthday, but Monday we were in Atlanta and as we entered the store, just Madison and I, I knew it was going to be a special moment. Madison had her birthday money from June and shopping we did! Some moments you simply have to savor in life. The smile on her face, the energy in her steps as she went from display to display, the way she grabbed my hand to pull me to see this and that... Madison's eyes were bright and shining as we went hand in hand racing to each part of the store, the store was fairly empty and we were being lavished on by the customer service staff. They were amazed we were driving back five hours that night to Alabama and were making Madison's trip as special as possible....I would have so loved to let her do dinner there and stay, but it was not what we could do, so Chick fil a was our next order of business followed by window shopping a few other "big city" stores....then a late night drive home...

It was a moment of victory, it was a moment of restoration of a life I thought was over once upon a time. You see, right after Madison was born I became functionally a single mom with a nineteen days old and a three year old child 6000 miles from any family. When she was three, the divorce paperwork was final. I was a single mom with two children and daycare costs that cost as much as I made teaching...suddenly in a school year without a contract after moving 6000 miles for the job...it simply didn't exist and I was working a $7 hr job at Tyson Foods writing, selling Mary Kay cosmetics to survive and provide a car to drive..... God had a plan, but I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel ...all I knew was nothing that had ever worked was working and there was not much hope of things changing fast enough to overcome the situations I was facing. I simply didn't believe that I'd ever be able to ever live the dreams I dreamed with my children.... I didn't believe we'd have a home again. I didn't believe we'd be happy again. I didn't believe that God would so restore my life in ways I could not imagine....and I certainly couldn't see how I would ever get past surviving on what I was making with no way to move to a place I could return to teaching....

Fast forward to last Monday night....thirteen years later....I drove to Atlanta in a new to me Volvo with a sunroof no less, I own a business I love helping others reach their goals. Who knew that writing a nursing manual for Tyson Foods would completely open new doors twelve years later as the skills learned there and in other situations over the last decade would prepare me for the life I live today? God has blessed me with the most amazing husband I could ever have imagined. We live in a new home God has provided and my life is blessed with two more amazing children.....you see walking across that store threshold was not about a store, it was about living dreams coming true.

We all get to that place where we simply think God can't "fix" what is wrong financially, emotionally, or whatever we're facing.....but God is God and His ways truly aren't our ways.....and He doesn't promise "I'll only fix your mistakes if they are not toooooo difficult" no, God forgives us our sins and guides our steps to a new peace, a new tomorrow, and a new closeness to Him when we seek God. Think about the men and women of the Bible, their mistakes were not small ones, yet God loved them, restored them, and called David a man after his own heart.

I look back at the snaps of Madison and I at that silly store in Atlanta and realize that God is God of the tiniest dreams too.....of dolls and little girl wishes...and Mama's who want so much for their children's dreams to come true. I am truly blessed, humbled again that God is God, and I am not. I am truly thankful that God is a God of the things that truly don't matter a hill of beans in the big picture but God is a Father who delights in loving his children and giving them the desires of their hearts....big and small.